Rubber Ducks I

Freya:Boo! Did I scare you?
Waffle:No. The creaking of floor boards and footsteps alerted me to your presence.
Freya:Ahh cmon! I can’t help that I’m such a heavy walker hehe! So what are you up to?
Waffle:I am observing the rubber ducks in this bathtub.
Freya:Ooo, hopefully they dont think I’m Freyzilla coming to destroy their little duck town and eat all their food… Well I would totally do that second part!
Waffle:The rubber ducks do not have society or emotions.
Freya:But they’re forming one! They’ve already colonized this bathtub! Who’s to say they won't take over the ocean next!
Waffle:I placed them in this body of water.
Freya:OH! So you’re helping them on their quest for world domination! Well, anything’s better than the roach world order I suppose, eww.
Waffle:No. I placed them here to observe and narrow down the scope of information I need to process.
Freya:What? Oh, I think I get what you’re saying, this is kinda meditative for you then?
Waffle:In human terms, yes.
Freya:Aww how cute! I didn’t take you as the kind of bot to enjoy something like this! Do you have a favorite ducky?
Waffle:No. They are all unique and offer different data points to observe.
Freya:Waffle look at that! The Queen and Clown are going to kiss! Oh how scandalous, they better hope the king doesn’t find out!
Waffle:The ducks do not have emotion. However, it appears the King was observing the side of the tub while the Queen and Clown collided.
Freya:I don’t know whether I should be relieved or upset! I mean true love is true love and I bet the Queen was probably forced into marriage. But at the same time, if the King finds out the monarchy could be thrown into chaos and cause the price of cake to rise!
Waffle:I predict if the King finds out about the affair, he will have the Clown executed and the Queen jailed. I do not foresee the price of goods rising in this scenario.
Freya:Ah good! We’ll even get a show at the gallows before dinner. WAIT! Hold up!? Is the King drifting towards the Clown now?
Waffle:Yes. The King is soon to collide with the Clown.
Freya:Oh ho ho ho! Do you think it’s gallows time?
Waffle:No. It appears they met on amicable terms.
Freya:NO! Don’t you see it’s much more than that! The Clown also kissed the King! I can’t keep up with this royal drama. So the King is also having an affair with the same clown that's seeing the Queen!? You don’t think, is the Clown trying to take the kingdom for himself?
Waffle:That is unlikely. The best course of action to take power would be to only have an affair with the King as he has more political sway over the kingdom. He would also be able to keep the queen under control if she were to find out about his affair.
Freya:Uuuuuhh, these duck politics are getting too complicated for me. *Growl* Hehe, well I’ll leave you to it! My belly’s calling for a royal feast!
Waffle:Wait. It appears the sunglasses duck is taking the Queen away while the King and Clown watch.
Freya:No way! I think I get what’s going on now! The Clown and King are lovers who devised a plan to get the Queen out of the picture! The plan was for the Clown to sleep with the Queen, the Clown would then leak this news to the King who would then be justified in exiling the Queen! So now I guess the King and Clown now rule the kingdom?
Waffle:That is a logical prediction. However, the clown seems to have something up their wing.
Freya:WHAT! Did you just see what I saw? The Clown just STABBED the King in the back!
Waffle:Yes. My records indicate a stab wound of that nature would lead to significant deflation and likely result in death.
Freya:*GROWL* Aww belly, it was just getting good! Sorry Waffle, my stomach says it’s time for me to stuff it silly. You’ll have to keep me updated on the duck kingdom!
Waffle:I will continue to monitor the situation as well as log these events in my duck history file.
Freya:Hehe, call me back if a war breaks out or a grain silo falls. I wanna have first dibs on the spoils!

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